It’s hard to concentrate on anything other than what ABC news is calling The American Event of the Century—Kim Kardashian’s wedding, not the new season of Hillbilly Handfishin’ (but close). Still, if you can pull yourself away for a minute, enjoy these shining moments from your week’s Soup.1. Joel McHale: Your beloved Soup boss and Spy Kids 4 star showed up on Live With Regis and Kelly looking for laughs. Reeg, on the other hand, was looking for holy vengeance. One down, four to go. Get a beer. 2. Kate Plus 8: Let’s get one thing straight. Kate Gosselin is in no way, shape or form jealous of the two-bit chump who sired her excuse for a TV show. And she’s going to tell you about it. 3. Jake Pavelka: The smilin’ Jakester may be a professional pilot, but his celebrity career is damn close to augering in. Thanks to that opportunity-destroying bitch Vienna. But don’t take our bile for it, let grim Pavelka testify to the damage done. 4. Celebrity Rehab With Dr. Drew: Michael Lohan is wrestling with a coke problem, but his biggest addiction seems to be Michael Lohan. No wonder he’s in so much pain. 5. Bachelor Pad: The base, uncontrollable desire for love and money are driving the sexy swingles cohabitating at the Pad to extremes. In fact, Kasey has plans for arch-nemisis Jake. Strange, twisted plans.