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An Account Of The Blake Griffin-Kendrick Perkins Dunk

I had the great fortune of being at the Los Angeles Clippers – Oklahoma City Thunder game last night.  My friend has season tickets and he was nice enough to offer me a seat, which he does on occasion.  Now, in the past, Clippers games were like Michael Bay movies; two hours of people running around doing things that made absolutely no sense and caused you to question the intelligence of everyone involved."Let's spend the movie trying to out run these machines that have wheels. That feels like a good plan."And to some degree that happens this year.  The Clippers are still learning to play together and their coach Vinny Del Negro sometimes looks like he wandered in to the building and is trying to find someone who might tell him where the bathroom is."Hi, um, I just was wondering if you guys had a bathroom? I'll buy something, I just really need to go."But they are young-ish, and athletic, and they have one thing that no else in the NBA has: Blake Griffin.  And last night, Blake dunked on Kendrick Perkins so god damned hard that he wasn’t just dunking on Kendrick Perkins.  He was dunking on everyone who had ever been named Kendrick.Anna Kendrick? YOU JUST GOT FUCKING DUNKED ON AND KENDRICK ISN'T EVEN YOUR FIRST NAME.Basically the play was a pick and roll where Chris Paul drew in the defenders, Blake rolled, and Chris hit him with a perfect bounce pass that split the defense.    It’s the most common play in basketball, and its a play that has delivered quite a few Blake dunks.  Normally everyone clears out and lets Blake angrily slam it home and play resumes.  But last night Kendrick Perkins nobly attempted to stop it.  And kudos to him.  He should have.  It’s his job.  Last year I watched Chris Kaman, the old center for the Clippers, time and again rotate late with his help defense, for the sole reason that he did not want to be the token white guy who got dunked on.  Guess what?  It usually happened anyway."Hi, Dwight. Would you mind laying it up so that I may save myself further humiliation?"So Kendrick went up to stop it, and fronted Blake a good three feet away from the basket, taking away the lane with which Blake would fly towards the rim and hammer home a dunk.  But instead of attempting to lay it up, blake rose in the air above Kendrick, so that Kendrick’s face was in Blake’s stomach (Kendrick is 6’10″ for reference), and then extended his arm out and hurled the ball at the rim like Zeus firing a lightning bolt at the earth which had angered him.Here it is for you to see:The crowd went crazy.  And I don’t mean that in the same way that Joe Buck says it during a broadcast of a Washington Redskins game no one gives a shit about.  The crowd literally lost their mind.  People were hurling things in to the air with reckless abandon.  No one even watched the next two minutes of the game.  There was an eight year old kid next to me and his dad turned to him and very seriously said “You are going to be able to tell your grandchildren that you were here to see that dunk.  I need you to remember this,” like he was giving him fucking directions on where to find him during the apocalypse."Don't ever forget this. And if someone tries to eat you, run."After a few minutes, and roughly 4000 replays on the jumbo-tron, people calmed enough to watch the rest of the game.  Was it the greatest dunk ever?  Who the fuck knows.  That’s an incredibly stupid question that will be used to fill two hours of sports talk radio today.  But it was a fantastic dunk, and I felt lucky to be there.

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